Normal Much?

So I was told because I keep some of the MANY ex's I have as friends.. who I talk to and check up on every now and then as a friend... or someone to just have a good convo with.... I was not normal.

Reginald, Steve, and Barry this one is for you.

Its seems that even though I could chill with these guys who I've done fuckd sucked and all that jazz with ... and not think of one sexual act that I would want to perform... still even being in contact with these gays is WRONG.

According to the normal radar.

So I ask this.. what's ever really normal?

Reginald was something like high school fling but then grew into this cute puppy like love.. still.. today I speak o him every now and then check on him and chilled with him recent. We are still much in tune.. but know its not right and won't work.. so a friend will be the title we give this. Still.. I can't imagine me doing this dude every again because he's not who my heart desire.

Then we have Steve. .i mean I talk to the kid..not much though because... well thats another story)but I would never date him in my life ever again nor share that same emotion I did when I was younger I thinking it was nothing more than lust. Still a hello will be passed and we go on our merry way.


Barry.... o the bajan man... love him like something good cooked at home.. but we are not going to ever be together again. We know this.. matter fact he's engaged and to be wed next year. We still crazy and open with each other but its a good friend yo thats my nigga type thing.
I hope I see his ass on the parkway though.
NIGGA I BETTER SEE YA LITTLE ASS!
*taps foot*


what do they all have in common?

The fact that they accept this shit and keep it fucking moving.
Not ho,ding onto that past but was just happy to know me.. and notice how much better as friend we work than as a unit of one.

So.... its not normal enough for ya huh?

See... I came to grips with the fact that my life.. is not normal.. but it works and keeps me happy.. so fuck what the other think... I mean really think about a crackhead.. you know she a crackhead.. she know it too.. not right for her but hey guess what.. she not finna change that aspect of life about her until SHE see its fitting.. she's happy.. and i think thats all that matters to her right about now.

I can't change who I am nor that company i keep because of what others think are not the norm.
They don't live my life and I'm very sure there are things about them that are not normal that I would frown upon but at the end of the day.. you gotta live ya life.

Live it the way to see it as right.

it's just that simple to me.. but maybe I'm just wrong.. with my happiness.


I don't think you understand that my life is all about me. Call it selfish.. but I was unhappy because I wasn't selfish enough to be true to self. Instead I played the whole lemme try role. Nah....

Maybe you just wrong for telling me how to live as if I was you...as if I was a normal chick to begin with? I think I really haven't made myself clear.

Maybe ... nothing should really be said at all as long as its not effecting you personally..
or maybe it does effects you personally and you just can't handle that you may seem secnd best to the rest. Then that would mean insucurties are flaring and proves yet again.

I shouldn't be fucking with you in th first place.