Listen.Like.Love.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Flag On Field.

Take a walk with me if you will.

You are talking to a dude who seems to have every reason in the world
to think and feel so insecure about you and him..
even though you tend to reinforce
that you are into him and care deeply about him.
You tend to try to understand what goes on in his head and even changed a couple of things in your life to accommodate his views just to ease his worries... and still.. this dude....wanna throw a fit.

Bitch about some frivolous shit.

Nah how about...
Anytime you talk to another dude (who's nothing more than a friend or has been reduced to a friend) You are crucified for having an adult convo or something along the lines.. yet this nigga answers the phone (while you on the other line) for bitches crying about how much they like him and wish they could be in his life as a girlfriend?

It seems like I can't have a life of my ow and still exist with him.
I guess we gotta become one and I should allow myself to lose who I am as a person.
It's the things a "real" girlfriend would do.

Nah lemme really go in son.

How about this nigga.. will mentally associate you with every other past bitch he ever fucked with and always bitching about the shit he go through on a daily basis making you feel like you are never around to really be that chick there for a nigga when he down even though you have actually lost sleep and all talking to this nigga and spending ya time on this nigga while trying to not be worried where the fuck ya own buck coming from and how you finna spend it?


I guess me not expressing how much I wanna boo him up makes it seem like I don't give a fuck.
Even though my keeping a low profile was and is the best way for me to even develop a god ad study base relationship with him before flaunting him to the world.. just to fall flat like every other relationship.

I mean. hell... it gets to the point where me walking outside seems to have become a hazard suddenly. As soon as I walk out the door he is worried about my well being and would really .. truly and honestly like to know my every move but too scared to ask because he know I will scream till my lungs collapse about how I am indeed a grown ass woman and have been taking care of myself before him and will after him. Then continue onward to express my hatred to his possessive ways.

Man..

Lemme tell you...
I think there is a great sense of bitchassness in my life.
I just don't know what to do with it though.


Sorry I gotta tell you in a blog homie...
But you my dear
You are one selfish, possessive son of a bitch
And quite frankly .... I'm growing tired of it already.